English Version | Send Nudes?

That's not the question at all. The question is this: what kind of society is this that encourages the dissemination and sharing, without consent, by third parties, of intimate and personal images? Where the victim is discredited and the perpetrator “excused” and even held non-accountable by the audience? If you've never heard of revenge porn, learn why the concept is bigger than the term and why it can happen to anyone. You too.

Artwork de João Oliveira.

"Send nudes." An expression so popular in today's vocabulary that it's even used as a joke, like a punchline or a comic twist in the middle of a conversation. As it should - a judgement free choice that should be a manifest of expression to be preserved. But there is a side to this practice that has taken on proportions that are far from being funny, quite the contrary. And it has nothing to do with the act of sending intimate photographs to someone — if it's something that brings pleasure with no harm of foul to others, why not send one, or many, seductive pictures? What may have been lost along the way is that to send nudes is not synonymous with sharing nudes without authorization, a practice that has been happening more and more, driven by several motivations, including the one that gave rise to the term “revenge porn.” Revenge porn is understood to be the act of publicly sharing intimate images of someone, without their consent, for revenge — usually associated with partners who are angry with the end of a relationship — but, nowadays, the idea of ​​revenge porn is much more wider than this dissemination for the purpose of punishing an ex. Episodes related to this concept multiply, paving the way to situations of bullying, public shaming, extortion, coercion and, in general, sexual abuse. The term is, therefore, fallacious and reductive, so it's extremely important to clarify: "We can start with the term pornography. Without getting into the whole issue of the pornographic industry, it's understood that the people involved are consensually providing a service that means recording images and/or photographs of a sexual nature that will be exposed on a platform, and that, in a way, the ones involved will benefit from this service. In this case, the victim sees an intimate image being disclosed, non-consensually, and which is not supposed to be shared on any platform. The use of the term pornography also ends up almost taking the gravity off of what is happening to that person.” The explanation is provided by Carolina Soares, who works for the helpline Linha Internet Segura and is here as a spokesperson for the complex work carried out by APAV – Associação de Apoio à Vítima (institution that helps victims of all sorts of violence) within this field. “The term revenge, in turn, can be limited, because when we talk about revenge porn, most people tend to think of a scenario that refers to a partner who is avenging something the other person did at the time of ending the relationship and that puts the blame on the victim — it looks like he did something to someone that didn't go down well and their pictures were released. Also, the motive behind the behavior doesn't always have to be revenge. It could just be out of spite or for financial reasons and thus we are talking about extortion or simply a desire to expose the other, that is, not necessarily in response to the victim's behavior ”, she clarifies. “Revenge porn is very appealing, but it is very harmful to the victim and to the way the problem is viewed, as it places much of the blame on the person who allowed being photographed or sent the photographs, as if he or she was asking for the pics to be released or involved in activities of this type, as if benefiting from that campaign. A small change in vocabulary can make a huge difference not only in the victim's own perception of the crime, but eventually, in what we think has to be changed in terms of policies, public, social and cultural attitude towards this phenomenon. We use other terms such as image-based sexual abuse or non-consensual disclosure of intimate images.”

When clarifying the term, Carolina Soares tackles several key points of this scourge that, she assures, makes up “the overwhelming majority of the cases we get.” It's not hard to see why they have grown, at first glance: the increase in digital communication and the information we store digitally and the increasing consumption of the Internet seem obvious triggers. But they are not the only ones: a deeper analysis reveals socio-psychological dimensions that, inadvertently or consciously, feed this type of behavior. “The ease with which something is written and shared online also often leads to the feeling of impunity, whatever you do behind a screen”, points out Filipa Jardim da Silva, clinical psychologist. “The lack of literacy and technological etiquette, the lack of responsibility that proliferates online, the attention that conventional media give to this type of shared content and the voyeurism proliferated by the media and social networks are factors that help explain the proliferation of these behaviors. and some reactions to it.” Case in point: Netflix's documentary The Most Hated Man on the Internet tells the story of Hunter Moore, responsible for the website IsAnyoneUp, a digital address that shared nudes without consent — of women, mostly, but also of men, allegedly submitted by third parties in possession of such images. Each post was also accompanied by the victim's personal information, such as the victim's Instagram account and other data (such as a phone number), making the colateral damage of those who found themselves in that situation even more devastating, with consequences not only in terms of mental health, but also in everyday life, such as job loss and breakups. Revolting, correct? It seems to be the obvious emotional response — only that's not thecase: moving forward in the documentary is realizing that the practice is almost categorized as entertainment and not crime, often (almost always) with more penalties for the victim than for the perpetrator. It is the victim who carries the shame of having intimate images shared, of being the target of mockery or judgment, even feeling a dose of naivety for having sent or made those images, feelings ratified by the discrediting that is instilled in them by the audience. and even, at times, by authority figures. There are those who, on the other hand — surprisingly or not — idolize the mentor behind this type of sexual abuse, considering him a kind of role model, a god-like figure and creating space for a cult with almost criminal repercussions. Out of curiosity, the platform registered, in a month (November 2011), profits amounting to 13 million dollars (through advertising and merchandising sales) and 30 million views. Actions that are “a consequence of the deficit of personal and emotional skills, which translates into more impulsive behaviors, in search of more immediate pleasure, without considering the consequences”, explains Filipa Jardim da Silva. “There are more and more people asking for psychological help following the public sharing of images and information about themselves, without consent”, she adds, corroborating the manifest increase in cases reported by APAV.

One of the most direct (and unfair) consequences of these episodes is, as mentioned by Carolina Soares, the burden that falls on the victim, whether placed by the victim or imposed by society. The aforementioned documentary tells a story that begins in 2010 and ends in 2012 (at which point the site shuts down for good, following an FBI investigation, a joint legal process against Hunter Moore and a series of attempts to shut down the platform by victims and anti-bullying activists), but a decade later it seems that not much has changed — neither the behavior of the aggressors, nor the social conditions that lead to it, reflected in the worst way possible on the victims: “There are several, and harmful, psychological and emotional consequences resulting from acts such as revenge porn or sextortion”, points out the psychologist. “There is a feeling of helplessness, which activates the entire nervous system, mobilizing the various possible fight-or-flight, freezing or collapse responses. The want of privacy causes shame, and often guilt, in the victim himself. Their identity is weakened, their self-esteem and self-image are severely affected, and a set of behaviors can result from this, such as isolation, changes in sleep, behavior, diet, substance abuse, self-medication or self-mutilation. These are situations that affect not only the target person but their various social systems, which makes the impact of these episodes so great and intense, which can lead to the breakdown of personal relationships, family and social conflicts and even negative consequences at a professional level. Depending on factors inherent to the personality of the one affected, their life history, the current moment they are in, the support network they have and even the culture in which they are integrated, the effects will tend to be more or less severe, but there will always be damage to mental and physical health. In some situations, in the face of a failure of emotional resources and enormous psychological suffering, suicide appears as an option and as a consummated act, as has already been seen in some situations made public.” Filipa Jardim da Silva's warning is not in vain. In December 2021, Egyptian Basant Khaled committed suicide following the publication of intimate photos altered to look like her – the responsible was a young man who Khaled had refused to go out with. Basant was 17 years old. In the suicide letter she wrote: “Mum, I hope you know that this girl is not me. These photos are fake, I swear to God. I'm a young girl and I don't deserve what's happening to me. I'm so depressed, I can't take this anymore. I am tired. I feel I'm suffocating. It’s not me, you raised me well.”

"It is, indeed, sexual abuse. A sexual abuse carried out through intimate images, but sexual abuse nonetheless.” - Carolina Soares

The word “abuse” seems, now, even too small for the dimension of a, potentially fatal, tragedy that continues to gather a certain lack of interest on society's part. “I think a lot of times people don't give it the relevance it demands. It is, indeed, sexual abuse. A sexual abuse carried out through intimate images, but sexual abuse nonetheless.”, points out Carolina Soares, from APAV. Unfortunately, the analysis comes from a painful experience with several victims: “Any image that appears on the Internet, especially of a woman who may be showing her breasts or genital area, is always seen in a negative way by society. The blame, somehow, seems to fall on the person who took, or made him/herself available, for the photograph, and not on whoever is divulging it. And this is true for a series of other attitudes, with cultural bases that make acting very difficult, later on. Not only are they a driver of motivations for those who are spreading the image, but also for the victims, as it makes it harder for them to talk about it and ask for for help. Whether it's friends, current partners, in case the image happened in the course of a previous relationship, parents... they feel very ashamed. And if they feel this shame and this hardship, it's because it's socially imposed on them. […] This isn't changing one bit, or at least we don't feel it is. There are progress that will have to be done at several levels, some in the short term and others in the long term. […] Platforms need to be more accountable, we need to demand more effective and faster identification mechanisms, technology that allows greater blocking or swift destruction of these images... We need strategies, or some pressure, so that the governments create policies and change the legal framework around this type of crimes — there are countries that are trying to develop a legal framework that makes it autonomous and that helps, but doesn't solve the underlying problem. Which is certainly cultural.” This is a focal point, because it relies on the root of the issue, its genesis. Soares continues: “Then it will be a full-time and long-term work, within schools, educational-wise, about the image we have of our bodies, our intimate and sexual life and our freedom to do what we want to do and not fear or feel shame of how it will later affect us; especially learn not to use this type of content against anyone. It's work to be done alongside communities, families, society, creating awareness through articles like this one, for example, that are discussing the topic and helping people who have already been through this and those who may experience it to start to have more information on their side and feel validated, that they have support and, eventually, also change people's point of view when they see themselves confronted with images like these and decide to share them.”

This is also why emotional support work such as that of Filipa Jardim da Silva is so important, along with the follow-up provided by the victim support association — and which is much more complex than one might imagine. At the level of a police investigation, APAV not only serves as a listener, but also alerts and acts to help anyone who is going through this scourge: “We follow up on these complaints not only at the beginning, in the first interactions, which are often by phone or email, as we later report them, and then, yes, already benefiting a lot from the network of contacts that APAV has, with a series of offices spread across the country — jurists, psychologists, social workers — and that's where we make a redirection, which the person can access free of charge and confidentially, as with any other case of violence.” The psychologist, in turn, confirms that it is “a process that benefits from professional monitoring considering its emotional severity and impact on a person's life and all their social systems. There is an important rehabilitation to be carried out in terms of trust because at a given moment the feeling these people have is that they cannot trust anyone, either now or in the future. Work on accountability versus blame is also critical; there is a lot of guilt often associated with these acts and reinforced by society. 'I was the one who exchanged those messages', 'I was the one who sent that photograph', 'I was the one who agreed to record ourselves'. Contextualizing behaviors and decisions is important in this process. Sometimes, those who have been the victims of such harmful behavior are also trapped in the attempt of revenge and justice, which is also not productive.”

Many of the situations that reach the Association originate from the Safer Internet Helpline. “It was created in 2019 because there are technical specificities in supporting victims of online crime”, explains Carolina Soares, “such as the tools we use to try to remove intimate content, as well as other types of partnerships. We work with the victim, trying to understand how they started the contact, whether or not it is a partner doing it, whether it could be an empty threat, emails that are often a bluff, etc. And we do a survey of the digital evidence, which is essential. Victims often want to automatically block the abuser but lose digital proof; if they later want to report the case, they cannot — for example, on WhatsApp, as the messages are encrypted, the platform does not access the content. That's why it's very important, when threats happen, that there are screenshots or screen recordings that prove them, otherwise neither the platform nor the Police will be able to access that content. The acting on it will always be faster, that way.” Carolina Soares continues to describe the intrinsic and extensive work that the association does. When we talk about victim support, this is, in fact, literal: “Our objective here is, on the one hand, to provide emotional support, that is, to ensure that the person realizes that he or she is not at fault, that the one committing the crime is whoever threatens or who spreads the content, and not the person who was photographed or who was simply in a more sexual or intimate conversation, and who has every right to do so. There is even a campaign called Safer Nudes, whose aim is to convey that the goal is not for people to stop having these types of interactions, but just to be aware of the dangers and do it more safely. And we do this work a lot”, says the APAV representative. “Then, throughout the process, making sure that digital body is removed. There is a data body that spills over into our physical world and that has immense serious psychological consequences for the person; we try to be a confidential support (without authorization we do not contact the authorities) and we always follow the path that, for victims, makes the most sense, presenting these alternatives, which will be communication with platforms, reporting profiles, blocking emails, checks on search engines, we follow up people who have already made money transfers with banks… And then we teach them how to strengthen security and privacy.” There is also the “monitoring on the part of digital literacy so that this does not happen again. Because the goal is not to stop using these platforms, but to feel strengthened in the knowledge they have in digital navigation and to do it with greater security.”

"That's why the message to be conveyed should not be judging the act of taking photographs, but rather the non-consensual release, often exacerbated by a criminal motive, of said picture. Carolina Soares mentioned the Safer Nudes campaign. In October 2020, the #nãopartilhes [#dontshare] movement emerged in our country — precisely with the aim of raising awareness and alerting to this type of abusive behavior. What this kind of initiatives have in common is the message to take away blame from the victims, by removing the weight of shame or naivety, imposed by society, which should not exist: “And this is, I believe, unconscious: phrases like 'she did it to herself' are sometimes said without thinking much about it, usually by people who have never gone through it, but that doesn't mean they can't go through it in the future”, warns Carolina Soares. Another safeguard as true as it is important: this image-based sexual abuse does not discriminate. “It is important that there is the notion that anyone can, at some point, be a victim of such a situation. People of different ages and genders, from different socio-cultural backgrounds, can also be affected. Sharing an intimate image in this private and trusting context says absolutely nothing about the person. But we increasingly need to be aware that what we store online, on a mobile phone or on a PC, can be accessible by anyone, so it is important that technological literacy levels can improve alongside emotional and health literacy levels", warns Filipa Jardim da Silva. "The problem is not new", notes the APAV representative, "but Internet and technology are propellers, in the sense that their evolution has allowed them to reach unknown people, who otherwise would not have their photographs accessible. Any one of us is exposed.”

“In terms of sexuality and individuality, our society has a long way to go. Many people continue to believe that there is an absolute right and wrong for everything, that we can only be one or the other. Either we are responsible and successful, or we are fun and irresponsible. Either we are serious and we are in a committed relationship, or we are easy and libertine. Especially in what concerns women." - Filipa Jardim da Silva

How, then, can we fight this ailment? First of all with sanctions and punishments, to deter future episodes. “Without a doubt, the impunity that surrounds these situations tends to reinforce their repetition, to make the victims' impotence even more acute and to facilitate the aggressors' disclaimer”, recalls the psychologist. The national and international legal framework only a few years ago began to shape itself to prevent this type of crimes, with several countries (United Kingdom, Canada, Malta, Israel, United States, for example) moving forward with criminalization of the capture or non-consensual dissemination of digital content of a sexual nature. In Portugal, it is foreseen as an extra paragraph to the crime of domestic violence that translates into an aggravation of the sentence, that is, a complaint related to sexual abuse based on images, occurring in the context of domestic violence, brings the culprit two to five more years of penalty. Outside this context, it can also be included in crimes such as extortion (if it involves blackmail in exchange for something against the victim's will) or invasion of private life, for example. The legal framework is recent: until 2018, the courts applied the provisions of article 199 of the Penal Code, related to illegal recordings and photographs, a reference that was too reductive for the dimension of the phenomenon. It was Law no. 44/2018, of August 9th, which reinforced the legal-criminal protection of privacy on the Internet. Bearing in mind that this is a legislation that is still in its early days, it may not seem like much (in fact, there are petitions and bills asking for a less timid penal framework), but it is, even so, a step towards the objective of eradicating this kind of situations. Carolina Soares adds: “There are those who argue that there is no need to create new legislation, because we will be adding complexity to the process. We must work with concepts that already exist, but perhaps develop a little more regarding the understanding of these crimes, that is, the motivations, behaviors and the way in which they are later framed in the various existing laws, more serious penalties when these crimes happen and eventually work more on this limbo in which the person is being threatened, but nothing has been published yet. People often say that they've even gone to the police station, but that the police couldn't do anything because the content had not yet been published. And I believe that if the person is already being threatened, if they are being extorted in exchange for not disclosing images, a crime is already taking place.”

And that leads us to another strong (if not the strongest) weapon of combat: “If we, as a society, consider that a certain crime is serious, this then has an impact on the legislative framework and on the way in which that crime is somehow punished”, points out the Helpline technician. The resolution begins, also and perhaps mainly, with us, as social beings – in the way we change the conditions we have and how we can prevent future generations from perpetuating stigma, interrupting the vicious cycle with education, awareness and changing mentalities. “We have a severe lack of empathy and compassion, following a general deficit in emotional and personal skills” regrets Filipa Jardim da Silva. “Skills that are not taught, trained or promoted in current education systems, that are not conveyed to families so that parents can do their best work, that are not yet sufficiently disseminated in organizational contexts.” The psychologist adds: “In terms of sexuality and individuality, our society has a long way to go. Many people continue to believe that there is an absolute right and wrong for everything, that we can only be one or the other. Either we are responsible and successful, or we are fun and irresponsible. Either we are serious and we are in a committed relationship, or we are easy and libertine. Especially in what concerns women, the way of dressing, the size and shape of the body and the movement of the body is always cataloged in a reductive way. This happens both in the exposure of intimate sexual images and in the investigation of private moments, as was the case of the Finnish prime minister who, simply having fun at a party, found herself involved in accusations of drug consumption and loss of political legitimacy to ensure their functions. There will always, of course, be a public component and a private component, the human being benefits from privacy, a safe place where one is how one wants to be and where one does what one wants to do without outside eyes, without pressure or comparisons. If shame diminishes, this weapon of coercion becomes more fragile, but the act of non-consensual dissemination of images or intimate information will not cease to be criticized,” she clarifies. And adds an appeal: “It is urgent to foster emotional intelligence among children, young people and adults. Without these personal, emotional and social skills based on self-knowledge, self-control, emotional regulation, empathy and collaboration, we will tend to lose the foundations that sustain a healthy community. It is urgent to promote mental health in a transversal and accessible way, in all segments of society. These maladaptive behaviors are more likely to be performed in the context of psychological illness or emotional vulnerability. It is also critical that we recover lost levels of citizenship, with more quality coexistence between people, with more collaborative relationships, not only in moments of crisis but in everyday life.” Filipa Jardim da Silva knows what she is talking about, as she has already been in contact with both sides of the issue: “I have followed teenagers and adults who were responsible for disclosing intimate images of another person. Just the fact that they seek help is already a good indicator in the sense of assuming and becoming aware that this behavior is not acceptable. Other times, it follows family or social pressure, and there is a longer way to go in raising awareness. The work will always be in the direction of fostering accountability and learning from what has happened, as in everything else in life. It is not productive to victimize and it is also not advantageous to blame in an extreme and absolutist way. It is necessary to support people, victims and aggressors, in a work of strengthening personal and emotional skills, so that they can extract constructive learning from negative and harmful situations, taking responsibility for what is in their field of action, with greater focus on the present moment and in the future, rather than changing something from the past.” And, if this message for the present and future was not clear, we remind you: there is an unquestionable side to this matter. The freedom of expression and choice — choosing to take and send (or not send) nudes — without being judged for it and, above all, without this implying a social permission for third parties to share them without consent. Just as it is ignorance (I would even say stupidly imbecile) to say that a woman was raped because she wore a miniskirt, no one brought on themselves the spreading of intimate images just because they took them.

*If you are a victim or know someone who is being a victim of non-consensual disclosure of intimate images, contact APAV through the toll-free number 800 21 90 90 or Linhainternetsegura@apav.pt.

Translated from the original on the Gossip issue of Vogue Portugal, published september 2022.All credits and stories on the print issue.